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Friday, January 13

Night of Misery Life

Last month stress about design project, at this moment, once again im so stress about my misery life. Okay it's not funny..nothing best to laugh at my painful burden coz you are not in my shoes...pergi google belajar balik idiom sekolah menengah kalau lemau sangat dengn English! Huhh..marah sungguh ni...


If org lain bersenang lenang dgn tenang pulun study IM or whatever subject you study by now for your upcoming final exam...here are reasons why Im so the "cuak-cuak babeh" :-

1) Less than 50% ilmu yg aku dh revise utk final paper this coming Wednesday - Industrial Management, agak senang tapi sangat rugi kalau tak dapat nak skor. Aku akan rasa ralat sangat kalau tak capai KPI sem ni..wahh, KPI =.=' Aku stress bila tengok semua member2 aku sibuk tengah buat past year dah, yang aku ni apa hal duk buka excel lagi buat graf buat testing duduk lab..come on laa final is priority kot untuk waktu ni. Arhhh~ persetankan mereka. ya aku dah cuba abaikan setan-setan tu tapi aku kalah sebab dorang tak sudah2 menunjuk yang dorang tengah buat past year, analisa soalan past year. Bangang laa...korang je ke yang tau nak study sekarang ni. Dah tu aku ni buat apa? lila-lila main wayang ikut suka hati rasa ribena je ke?



2) Final year project progress - ok, this 1 whole week, 4 hari aku bertapa sepagi sepetang dalam Automation Lab run conceptual testing, melayan kerenah wayar Flexinol yang ada kuasa magis. Data yang suka main cak-cak dengan kitorang sampai kitorang pun sejuk beku duduk dalam lab tu. Segalanya untuk supervisor dan co-supervisor kesayangan. Aku redha, niat dorang baik sebab nak bagi kitorang faham tentang FYP kitorang ni. Itu belum termasuk rehearsal presentation (VIVA) yang SV aku request, tu pun aku tiba2 terfikir untuk minta postponed rehearsal tu after final paper kitorang. Alhamdulillah, dia setuju. Kalau tak aku pengsan dengan report proposal sebab nak study balik apa aku tulis dalam report tu. Banyak sangat benda nak fikir nak uruskan, jadi short term memory je semua.



3) HVAC mini project - aku memang tak banyak contribution dalam project yang ni. Just sempat buat calcualtion untuk solar path, tu pun aku pening kira eventhough guna excel. Sebab data dia pelik-pelik. Walaupun ketua kumpulan tak ada la guna 100% data yang aku kira but at least I do something there. Floor plan bangunan pun aku yang cari, kira okay laa tu kann..Thanks to one of my friend from FSPU yang dah bekerja dekat industri. HVAC...I have no damn idea abaout it now. Serious aku tak tahu apa yang aku belajar 1sem ni. Apa aku buat? Ahhh..report pun dorang dah siapkan, esok tinggal present je. Hope everything gonna be smooth, kalau nka kena marah dengan lecturer sebab aku tak dapat nak menjawab persoalan dia pun aku redha, aku pasrah. Memang khilaf aku sendiri.


Seriously..feel like im such a looser! I don't give a damn to my future. Come on, final exam sangat penting okay, that is my last final exam for this whole 4 years degree. My final battle untuk perform dalam exam, surely I want to give the best from me. The final chance for me to score, to upgrade my CGPA. Arhh....actually feeling to call my daddy tadi tapi dah tengah malam, aku tak nak dorang risau pula tak tidur malam sebab fikirkan jiwa kacau aku ni. 

So I take an initiative to write and post it on my blog, advice from my friends who understand my stage of stress right now. Thanks! Korang memang terbaik, at least you give some support and sweet talk to comfort me. Rather than "Like" my FB status yang hanya menambah sakit hati aku tangok. Bukannya nak bagi kata-kata semangat ke ape...so people, I advice you, aware sikit dengan apa yang korang nak 'Like' dekat FB tu. Not everything you can simply 'Like', some are not necessary to do so. Interact with it in other way please. Politely. :)

Lastly, people who laugh a lot, you might think they are the happiest person and you envy of their happiness, they actually burden and pain inside. The happiness and joyful face, their jokes are just some of the masquerade they wear to suite the parade of life cycle. Understand? Ouhhh...english literature sangat aku ni.....Sorry guys, if you feel like I am emotionally unstable. My bad, I admit.


*It is hard to have this end of part 7 life chapter as engineering student*
*final year pening*

3 comments:

yad'z said...

juz be strong and tawakal.. hope dipermudahkan segala urusan.. amin.. =)

daleela said...

hey girl!!! i know ur r very strong...don't give up k...fighting!!! (^_^) xmo stress2..xbaik utk kesihatan~~t8cre dear~~

NuryBella said...

Thank you babes :) I try to defeat it..on my way...huhhh